Reducing the Herpes Risk in Relationships: How Not To Spread and How Not To Get

Herpes is no small disease, effortless to get rid of, just like the flu. If you, your partner or someone close to you has acquired it, it is best to take precautions as herpes could be easily transmitted, especially through the act of having sexual intercourse. Therefore, we have arranged a list of the methods that could be used to limit the chances of contracting or transmitting herpes:

Manage Things with Your Partner

Now, not everyone is in a committed relationship, which is comprehensible. For all those men and women who are in the dating and partying scene need to remember to be careful. Some guidelines to live by would be:

  • Even if you are about to have a one night stand, ask them if they have any kind of sexually transmitted disease
  • Try to limit the number of sexual partners you have
  • If you are about to have sexual intercourse with a person, get to know them; ask them about the number of people they have had sexual intercourse with
  • If they have sores around their mouth or genitals, do not indulge in oral, vaginal or anal sex with them
  • Never have sexual intercourse with someone while under the influence of alcohol or drugs

Even those individuals who are in a committed relationship must be cautious, be it monogamous or polygamous. Now, we understand that having the talk with them about whether or not they have any STDs could be embarrassing for some of us. However, it is absolutely necessary, especially if you do not wish to spend the rest of your life regretting NOT asking the question. Here are some things you could try:

  • Make a pact to get the both of you checked for herpes
  • Ask them if they have had sexual intercourse with many people in the past
  • Ask them if they have ever had any form of STD in the past

One of the most important things to remember is to let your partner know about the matter, if you have herpes. They have the right to know and think about what they are about to get into.

Educating the Patients

A lot of people forget that herpes, although not deadly, could be quite scary. Also, there is a large portion of the general public that has never even heard of herpes. If you know anything at all about herpes, you should discuss it with those around you. Spread the message, as it may help just about anyone! Also, if you think you or someone close to you has it, speak to an expert about it and gather as much of information as you can.


CondomSince there is no direct, skin-to-skin contact possible, latex condoms also prevent the transfer of the herpes virus. Admittedly, people were not subjected to experiments to understand the exact way that condoms help with keeping herpes at bay. However, countless questionnaires and polls that were taken over the course of the last decade or two showed that condoms definitely helped the matter; if a man has the herpes 2 virus, wearing a condom will assure a lower risk of him transmitting it to their partner, assuming they are both monogamous.


If someone has herpes, they have outbreaks every now and then. This is a period when the patient has sores and blisters around their mouth or their genitals, based on the type of herpes virus their body contains. Not only are they risking their partner by having sexual intercourse during such a time, they are also making the sex painful, thanks to their lesions and blisters. Therefore, the best idea during this time is to keep away from having sex.

Suppressive Therapy

A lot of brands and companies of dietary supplements or herbal preparations cite that they help eliminate the risks and problems of herpes completely. As a matter of fact, some swear that they completely rid the patient of the disease. However, these claims are baseless and are definitely not true. But there happens to be a method that could decrease the amount of viral discarding: herpes medications that need to be ingested every single day. Some of these medications are valacyclovir and acyclovir, the first offering up to 40-50% of risks of outbreaks. It seems that the daily intake of these medications help reduce the number of outbreaks, especially if you have been making use of them for a while now.

Lead a Relaxed Life

Taking a load of stress due to having acquired herpes could just make the matter worse. According to experts, being all uptight, upset and stressed out about herpes seems to correlate to the rate at which the patient has outbreaks. Therefore, do not forget to learn to love yourself and your body. Additionally, remember to keep smiling through it all!

The Psychological Effects of Herpes You Should Know

Being Diagnosed With Herpes

Knowing the fact that you have acquired herpes could affect you deeply, whether it is herpes type 1 or herpes type 2. While some individuals have heard of this condition before, others are clueless about it. Needless to say, the latter group have a more difficult time adjusting to the problems and implications of herpes.

Bitterness and anger are feelings that are bound to come flooding in if you happen to be diagnosed with herpes. It is quite common to see herpes patients thinking to themselves, “If only I had not…”. In other cases, patients are seen being upset with their partners for having herpes and transmitting it to them. While these feelings are quite stressful, they are part of the grieving process. Patients should keep in mind that negative feelings will not turn time backwards; neither will they make them feel any better.

Psychological Effects of HerpesAnother common emotion among herpes patients is fear. This may come in various forms: some people may be scared of their loved ones finding out about their condition, others may be petrified of socializing any more, some may even be horrified thinking that they cannot have sexual relationships with people as much as they used to before. Such individuals need to understand that they are not alone. Also, it will get better with time and they will find happiness soon.

Some Myths Regarding Herpes

There are several myths that contribute to the depression, anxiousness, hopelessness and helplessness faced by the patients. Some of them have been mentioned below:

  • 1. Herpes is quite rare; not many catch it.
  • 2. The virus could be passed onto new-born babies, hence patients can never have children.
  • 3. Herpes is a result of being highly promiscuous.

How Stress Has an Impact on Herpes Outbreaks

There are countless damaging effects that come from the stress due to suffering from herpes. However, the scariest effect is the one on the patient’s herpes outbreaks. After a ton of research and tests, it has been discovered that there is a link between heightened stress and herpes outbreaks. Those who have a tougher time accepting the fact that they suffer from herpes find themselves facing higher numbers of outbreaks. As a result, this person then gets entangled in a cycle of never-ending occurrences.

Needless to say, the number of outbreaks in turn causes high stress levels in the person. At a point, they find themselves feeling hopeless and weak. Unfortunately, there is a direct connection between physical and psychological health, which means individuals with a lot of negative emotions are bound to face a bigger number of herpes outbreaks.

How to Deal With These Psychological Effects

Accepting What Has Happened

Being in denial will just add to your pain and cause problems, like stated above. Herpes does not have a cure and requires treatments for a lifetime, including visits to your doctor and ingesting medications prescribed by him/her. Once a patient accepts the fact that they have herpes, they could work on ways to deal with outbreaks, their personal relationships and their overall health and happiness.

What You Should Not Do

  • Most importantly, never ignore the symptoms: If you come to notice blisters around your mouth or genitals, please visit your doctor as soon as possible. Do not ignore the signs due to fear or carelessness. Also, ignoring the signs will not make herpes go away.
  • Do not lose yourself in the process of feeling self-pity: If you have caught herpes, it is natural to feel down. However, do not dwell in it to the point where you get depressed and risk facing higher numbers of outbreaks.
  • Do not hide the fact that you have herpes from your partner: You need not disclose your secret to them if it is just a date. However, if you are ever serious with a person to the point where you are considering having a sexual relationship with them, you must let them know of your problem. Take a look at this post to know how to have the talk.

What You Should Do

  • Educate yourself about herpes as much as you can: There is a ton of information you could find on herpes, each useful if you happen to suffer from it. You could make use of this data to take care of your condition appropriately, along with educating others.
  • Talk to a counsellor about your emotions: If you are stressed out due to the fact that you have herpes, speak to a therapist. They will definitely help you feel better.
  • De-stress yourself: Treat yourself to things that bring you happiness and make you feel at ease.